I cannot explain the amount of times I’ve rolled my eyes at the suggestion that I take the problems in my life and view them as challenges or opportunities.
Seriously, fuck those people for being right.
They’re right. Absolutely, one hundred percent right. I can’t stand that it’s the case and I wish I can say that people who prescribe to that philosophy are dopes, but it would be a lie.
Every single stopgap – every pain, frustration or failure is a chance at being better. It’s hard to believe that, especially whenever we’re in the midst of the many existential crises we’ll experience.
The past few months have been tough. I’ve managed to injure myself training for the NJ marathon, sort of hit a dead end on an opportunity I was pursuing and managed to fall head first into a severe case of writer’s block (the jury’s still out on whether that’s as severe as I seem to want it to be). Sure, everything else is great, but I’ve found it pretty easy to let the hiccups get to me sometimes, and for the past few weeks they did.
Now, it’s not like I was in a depression or I was grumpier than normal. That really wasn’t the case. This time was more, spiritual, I guess? That whole weight of the world on my shoulders seemed pretty real.
So what do we do here? Is it so easy to say, “Okay, this sucks. Let’s review, define and find a means to change this into a next step.”
It’s super easy to say that shit. Execution is the bitch here.
Slowly, I’m getting there.
I’m aggressively rehabbing my running injury and some experimenting has actually given me positive results. If I take my lessons and continue on this path, I might be able to wrap a marathon up before the end of the year. Sure, the goal was to do 2, but I still have time and will get in races as often as I can.
That opportunity I won’t be detailing? Well, while it’s not necessarily “happening” there’s a small light at the end of the tunnel and if I network the right way, I might just be able to make the move I want. It will just happen a little later than planned.
Lastly – the writing.
That’s a toughie.
It’s very easy to get caught up in planning a story. It all seems to work in your head perfectly, but I find the struggle is getting it all on the page. I’m not giving up, though. I’ll push for a few words here and there, and hopefully that will become pages again.
This is all pretty ham fisted, and I’m pretty sure this is just some form of therapy for me today (I said I wasn’t making a theme of this project, it’s just going to be free form rambling). If you can relate to any of this, that’s awesome. Maybe this provides you with a little perspective. If not, that’s cool too. Though, it’s really weird you’d read all this if it didn’t really touch a shared experience.
Ah well, enough navel gazing. I think my next entry will be an elitist rant about why something is awesome/awful and you’re all too stupid to realize it.